3/5 of my kitties
it’s nice to be home

life is too short to waste your time talking to someone who doesn’t get your sense of humor


posted 5 days ago

operation watch/re-watch funny 30-minute shows to make me feel better:

  • the office
  • veep
  • scrubs (in progress)
  • arrested development
  • 30 rock

I finally finished and turned in my REU paper.

Maybe I can relax and read again.

Maybe I can finish a new tv show.

Maybe I can start new things.

posted 1 week ago

am I really that insignificant?

posted 1 week ago

this is my safe place

not that rankings mean anything

but it is slightly comforting that uchicago is #4 on US news’ list

like it’s worth it for some reason

my icon at the moment

my icon at the moment

I haven’t had coffee for what feels like weeks. Maybe that’s why I’ve been feeling down. I need caffeine now that I’m alone again.

"Did you just do your eyebrows? They look awesome."

Why, yes, yes I did. Thank you. My eyebrows feel like the only thing I can control in my life right now so I appreciate that compliment, friend.

I’m somewhere between ENFP and INFP. I think it depends on the day.

finally dragged myself to work and i dont want none of it

finally dragged myself to work and i dont want none of it

Dinosaur egg oatmeal can heal all wounds.

posted 2 weeks ago

This time last year I was literally aching to get back to Chicago. To watch the ivy blush in the fall and to parade around campus with my books and my coffee and my thoughts. I craved the independence I had grown to know so well. The promise of a new year made my stomach twirl. I was ready for everything to be new. New experiences, new ideas, new relationships. I was ready to be new again.

What has changed?

I haven’t left my apartment in days. I can’t bring myself to get out of bed, finish my REU paper, to make lunch. I re-learn my lesson, time and time again, expectations are useless. Hope is poison. I don’t want to think about what this school year will bring. I am living in uncertainty, and it doesn’t excite me anymore. I am more scared than ever.

And it’s a different fear than the one I felt the month before starting college. Instead of a fear of possibilities, it’s a fear of impossibilities. 

By the time I graduate, I will have had four of these early Septembers. Each one different, poignant, and accompanied by loneliness.

Or so it seems. I’ll have to wait til next year.

I have a hard time feeling comfortable in silence.

posted 2 weeks ago